At the age of 21, I was a wife and a mother to two girls aged one and two. My husband at the time was a Military Policeman in the Army. He was stationed in El Paso, TX, 2500 miles away from our family and friends. My ex-husband did not make a lot of money being in the military, and we lived below the poverty line. Needless to say, this caused quite a strain on our marriage.
When driving back to NH after my husband was discharged from the Army, we became stuck in traffic when it was my turn to drive. A large tractor trailer had jackknifed at the end of a bridge, an event which led to my first major panic attack. It was an awful feeling. I literally felt like the bridge was going to collapse, and we were going to die. I yelled repeatedly to my ex-husband, “I need to get off this bridge now!” as I tried opening the door to get out. He kept telling me to sit down and knock it off. The feeling was just so intense, and all common sense went out the window for me. Thankfully we started to move shortly afterwards.
That day was the beginning of a twenty year struggle with anxiety. Attacks began to pop up sporadically. In the beginning, I would put frozen peas on my face as I went grocery shopping to cool myself down. I could feel myself shaking and felt like I was going to die. I didn’t share this with anybody for a long time.
My ex-husband and I divorced after six years of marriage. I was a single mom with two kids, and my stress level was very high, which only increased my panic attacks. I was going into stores and literally running out a few minutes later from a panic attack. My children thought it was funny that we were running out of the store. I would try to make it a game so they wouldn’t see what was really happening.
The anxiety became so bad that I would avoid stores at all costs. I would go to 7-11 or a tiny neighborhood store to get things I needed. After a while, that became tough as well. I would make excuses as to why I couldn’t attend certain events or go out to dinner with people. I remember going Christmas shopping with a friend at Walmart for a family that had a house fire. We got close to the toy section, and I told her I had to go to the bathroom. I wasn’t able to go back to the toy department. She was extremely upset with me because she didn’t understand anxiety.
I’ve had people tell me to just get over it and that I was making it all up. That was definitely not the case. I finally went to the doctor and was put on medication. While this definitely helped, it didn’t stop the attacks altogether. I was able to go to a lot more places, but there were still plenty I still avoided, such as large arenas or airplanes.
Fast forward to 2014, when my friend told me about a newer type of healing called “Reconnective Healing.” I checked it out and was amazed by it, knowing immediately that it was something I wanted to learn. In May of 2015, I learned that Eric Pearl was going to be in Stockbridge Mass training and certifying people in this amazing energy healing. While there, I had my first healing, a fantastic experience that healed me of my major anxiety issues. A month after I was certified, I was able to walk at my own graduation, for my BS in Business, at a very large arena. It was a very proud moment in my life!
I want to share this healing with others and help them as well.